Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
Tell me the dirtiest joke you know
Sarah Palin
god, I love you
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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