I don't remember. Are we still dating?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Randomize
