i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
i watched you ride a mechanical penis. nothing is awkward between us anymore.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
