people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize