wat bout pragnant strippers??
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
