The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
We walked through the hotel lobby in slow-mo taking huge steps because we were astronauts, and astronauts obviously can't be drunk.
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
If I wear a tail on Halloween, how am I supposed to grind? Maybe I will just wear devil horns
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
