They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize
