As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
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