Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Randomize
