Do you have any cake mix? I kind of need to make a "im sorry i drank all your parents tequila, threw up all over your floor and slept with you boyfriend" cake.
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
