I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
Randomize
