Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
