Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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