im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
Its a good night when you get to makeout with a cowboy
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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