you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
Yeah, first time I've shit my pants in my twenties... I'm thinking about putting it on my Facebook timeline
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
how do you play pong handcuffed?
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Randomize
