check it out our google latitudes are spooning
he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Ya know, I lied. I wouldn't mess with him. Not because of the crazy/rehab issues... but because he wears tank-tops.
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Randomize
