just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
Putting Chia seeds in beer makes it ok for my diet, right?
It's fun yes. But hard on the body. I woke up with her purse, socks and one of her shoes in my room. The other shoe was outside. What the fuck were we doing last night?
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
