But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
