Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
The Blue Grotto manager called. He asked me for your name and number. Apparently, on reviewing the videotape he noticed you consumed a whole pizza by yourself. He indicated that he has a tshirt for you and wants to put your picture on his eating wall of fame. Apparently, you are the first such person to complete this incredible feat of eating. Congratulations to you!! I am so proud.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I need to find parents that want to take care of a grown adult. I'm sure there's a website out there for that. Like a sugar daddy but sugar parents.
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
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