I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
Stories of my weekends have cause divorces, are you sure you wanna hang out?
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Randomize