guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
