just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
Randomize