Where are you?
In a non slutty way
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
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