are you still at the devil's house?
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Randomize