handjob tips. give me some.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
when my professor asked "does anyone know what streches across south america" and a kid in the back row said "my exgirfriends vagina" i knew i was at home.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
8:30 every morning in the third floor bathroom we fuck in the handicap stall. You have your morning workout and I have mine.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Fell asleep on kitchen floor again, chicken nuggets everywhere.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
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