R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Randomize
