I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Its about making memories worth repressing
I think its a sure sign I need to get laid when every cloud in the sky looks like a penis.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Is it OK to disqualify a potential therapist if she lists 50 Shades of Gray as her favorite book? Or is that a good thing?
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Randomize
