At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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