the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
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