There is no way he is gay with that hair.
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
He's trying to row the canoe up my front yard like he is Lewis and Clark.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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