i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I just had to take my laptop away from him because he was on Amazon and had 20 Seahawks garden gnomes in his cart.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Idk, but the girl in his story had really nice eyebrows and was singing The Climb. How about you CLIMB the fuck away from my man
FORGET THE EYEBROWS
Randomize
