@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
On the way to have sex with my ex's roommate... I have hit a new low
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
The air I exhale reeks of whiskey and bad decisions
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
