absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Also, you tried to make me learn all of the presidents, in order, with a picture book as an aid. At 4 am. What the fuck?
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Randomize
