I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
Do you still have your period?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I'm sending midget strippers dressed as bull fighters with mini bottles of 1800 to your house. Already made the call. Jer is going halves on it. Can't be stopped! Won't be stopped!
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize
