i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Randomize
