awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize