ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Dude, you went to another fraternity's formal as a joke and came home with one of their dates. AND you managed to get her number. Please explain to me how that's not a good night.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
I'm concerned I may die tonight. All I've been told about my bday shenanigans is to bring slutty clothes, a bikini, tylenol, sunglasses and pjs. Tell me what the fuck is going on...now
bring lube too
i hate all of you
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
