I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
I have never heard someone not give a fuck so poetically in my life. I feel like you should be leading men into battle with a speech like that
WHO INVENTED HANGOVERS WHERE ARE MY CLOTHES
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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