Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
my math professor just wrote "parallel" on the board, but spelled it "pararrel". guess what country he's from
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It's still fucked up that my mom let me think Vanilla Ice was my dad for YEARS just because she thought it was funny.
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