Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
How bad would it be to ask my maintenance man for new blinds because the dude puked on those too?
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
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