oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
