You dirty dirty liar I like the way you twitter
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
So...guess who had sex tied to the ladder of a caboose under the stars in Joshua Tree? This bitch
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
