Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
Randomize
