I can't watch pbs sober anymore
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
can u get pink eye on your cock?
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
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