she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
I don't wanna be 33 that's when Jesus died
Randomize
