Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
The condom broke. Its OK tho, turns out I was just humping her thigh for 20 minutes. Jager dude, Jager.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
Ahhh, the bane of our relationship.... His mediocre penis
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