I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
well that explains the french fry and ketchup packet rolled into the wasitband of my sweats. thank you drunk me.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
