When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I ate the last cupcake. I'm sorry. It was in the refrigerator mocking me. So I ate it. And it was glorious. But I'm sorry.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
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