I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
Everytime I get drunk I wake up hugging the bag of bagels from three months ago
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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