Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
SOME GIRL ON THE STAIRS IN FRONT OF ME JUST FARTED AND IT WENT STRAIGHT INTO MY MOUTH!
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
He just pushed one of his testicles up into his stomach and called himself lance armstrong. I can't make this shit up.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
Randomize
