porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
Kid sitting next to me smells like he slept in a dutch oven full of farts. Going to die.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
The people at Perkins seem so judgemental. Big deal if i'm handcuffed to stripper in a star-n-stripes bikini. We still gotta eat.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
